(no subject)

[imaginist]

In the past 48 hours, someone in this building has played "All I Want for Christmas Is You" a total of sixty-one (61) times. I don't know if this is one person or several people throughout the day, but it's become intolerable. We are still at the beginning of the month.

[DM: Parson Starling & Crysta Waldinger]

Please respond to this survey at your earliest convenience:

1) What are your plans for Christmas?

2) Are you currently dating anyone?

3) On a scale of 1–10, rate how much you want to discuss other events this month, with 1 being "never and I don't even know what you're talking about actually" and 10 being "I want an actual serious conversation about it, but I will mercifully allow us all to get drunk first."

Comments

[coulee]

[...] 61 times huh

[imaginist]

It's excessive. Can't they save their enthusiasm for the actual date?

[coulee]

but what about 🎄the hype🎄?? gotta build up that enthusiasm, let it marinate.

[failson]

If they don't stop, I'm going to go gnaw through a powerline.

[imaginist]

You shouldn't risk electrocution for this, when we can simply find where they live and drag them out to be executed.

[failson]

They're also playing it in the Commercial Center. Electrocution would be a kindness at this point.

[beautyfull]

if i hear it 3x more i will commit my first murder.

[coulee]

not you too 😢

[beautyfull]

it's literally stuck in my head it's torture

[imaginist]

Your first murder?

[beautyfull]

*that i will take credit for

[unperceive]

exciting!

[beautyfull]

do you wanna help or be the victim

[crawlwaller]

But it's the most wonderful time of the year

[imaginist]

Please tell me you're being sarcastic.

[crawlwaller]

What do you think is the most wonderful time of the year

Waldingers + Parson

[emulsify]

I hope you're properly anonymizing these results.

1.) idk, thinking about getting an airbnb somewhere with a beach and without purple crystal trees.

2.) no lmao?

3.) uhhhhhhhhhhhh. that's gonna be a 2 from me.

Waldingers + Parson

[beautyfull]

like when would u be going would there be any time here you can't just like, BE ALONE for all of the holidays??
Unless yr lying about 2 and they're yr secret cabana date in which case i guess dont let us stop u.

ok here's mine knock if u don't also fill it out these are all void

1) currently only have hanukkah plans

2) entrapment

3) Like [..] mostly 12 5. sometimes 9 but we don't

Waldingers + Parson

[imaginist]

You already know my answers to the survey questions.

Waldingers + Parson

[imaginist]

1.) Alone?

2.) Hmmm. Noted.

3.) Perfect. We're on the same page.

[unperceive]

of course you're a hater

[nolitangere]

As someone who watched Glitter (2001) during its theatrical run and paid 249 United States Dollars for a factory-sealed edition of Chick’s Someone’s Ugly Daughter from MAPCDJAPAN on eBay, I am allowed to play Mariah Carey as much as I want. As loud as I want. The government said so.¹



__________
¹ I’m the government.

[failson]

Hmmm, all right.You can, but no one else.

[nolitangere]

If there are other members of the Lambily among us, I have to fight for their rights, too. You understand this, I hope.

[imaginist]

I don't know what this means and I'm not looking further into it, but I am newly grateful I don't live on the fourth floor.